Who says gluten-free has to be boring?

Since having to go GF back in January I've learned a few things about taste. Most GF products still taste great and similar to their non-GF predecessors, but there are some products that pretty much taste like the empty roll of toilet paper. Being new at this whole diet, I thought that was the way it was gonna be and I'd just have to adapt to the change.

Oh how naive I was.....

GF can still taste great! So I'll let you in on a few of my favorite tricks and favorite GF products.

Most of my GF mixes comes from the RED MILL brand that I buy from Meijer (I'm sure others stores stock it as well). Their mixes taste great and the prices are reasonable. If you haven't figured it out yet, most things labeled 'Gluten-Free' are highly overpriced. So my goal when I go grocery shopping is trying to find the best product for the best price, and, yes, it means spending A LOT of time in the grocery store(s) - (the main reason I usually end up going solo). The Red Mill's brand has everything from pizza mix (which can also be used to make cinnamon rolls) to cornbread mix to pancake mix. Yesterday for dinner I made a GF stuffed crust pan pizza. Amazingly delicious doesn't quite express the yumminess we devoured. I had many friends ask for the recipe. So I will share my beloved pizza making skills with you Ü

It's simple really. If I can do it, so can you. You'll need the Red Mill's GF Pizza Crust mix, warm water, 2 eggs, olive oil, and a yeast packet (that comes IN the bag). That's it. Simple ingredients, right? Just follow the instructions on the side of the bag and BAM - you'll have an amazing GF pizza. The nice thing about this brand is the mix makes two 12'' pizzas or one 16'' pizza. When I make a stuffed crust pizza I usually will make a 16''.

I had some friends ask me how I stuff my crust (that kind of sounds.......dirty). ANNNNND moving on.......

The instructions say to cook the crust for 7-9 minutes BEFORE putting any sauce or toppings on the pizza. BEFORE you do this step you need to stuff your crust so it allows the cheese more time to melt. After you have the dough laid out in your pan, place your cheese all the way to the edge of the dough. I just use string cheese (mozzarella). Leave about and inch or so in-between each cheese....you'll need the room for rolling. After you've placed the cheese on the dough (I use about 6 string cheeses for a 16'') start gently rolling the dough and cheese TOWARDS the center of the crust (covering the cheese with the dough and you go). You don't need to necessarily completely cover the cheese with dough. When I did it I made sure about 3/4 of the cheese was covered. The rest will be covered by sauce and toppings. After you've rolled your cheese into the dough you can THEN cook your crust for 7-9 minutes. After the first round of cooking, take your dough out and add your sauce and toppings then place back in the oven for another 15-18 minutes.

One thing about cooking GF is the cooking process is usually different than cooking with regular wheat flour. If I could give any advice it would be to FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS! Rice flours and all the other GF flours cook differently so you need to make sure to read carefully.

Red Mill's GF Pizza Crust Mix

The before

And the after

(Looks amazingly delicious right??!?)

And here's my slice right before it was devoured in 2 seconds

It takes about an hour (maybe less) from start to finish, but it is WELL worth your time. And about $4 or so bucks for the mix, you can't beat it!

Some of my other favorite mixes are:

Red Mill's Bread Mix

One thing to note about GF breads is they are typically dryer than wheat based breads. Don't fret! Thats an easier fix than you think. I follow the recipe on the bag, but add some moisture based foods like sour cream, powdered milk, potato flakes, or yogurt. I don't ever have a specific measure for how much I do, I just eye it. If you're unsure a 1/4 of a cup should do it.

Red Mill's All Purpose Baking Flour Mix

 This stuff is the BOMB! When I first become GF I research and research and research how to make my how GF All Purpose Flour mix. Needless to say, not only was my mind overloaded, but I also became discouraged! Not only did I have to purchase MANY items to make for ONE flour mix, but it was expensive. Other GF All Purpose Flour mixes I found online and in 'hippie food store' (aka Whole Foods, Fresh Market, etc) costed more than my first born. I honestly thought I was going to starve for the rest of my life (not really, but you get the picture). One day while I was happily walking through Costco I spotted Red Mill's GF-APBF mix - and for around $8-9 bucks a bag (5 lbs) I thought I won the Powerball! You may be thinking, now Darci, that's pricey! Guess what folks, compared to others......this is a deal! Plus I trust Red Mill's brand.

Betty Crocker's GF Cookie Mix

HELLLLLLLO HEAVEN! Let me tell you something. When I was first diagnosed with Celiac Disease, my honest to heavens response (and first world problem issue) was "IM GOING TO STARVE AND NEVER EAT AGAIN, THIS IS AWFUL!!!!" I mean, think about it, how much of the food you eat has gluten in it? Just about everything! Sauces, seasonings, pastas, dressings, ice cream, drinks, and so on and so on. So when you find something like COOKIES that are GF, it feels a lot like Christmas. Betty Crocker also makes and GF Brownie mix and GF Cake (chocolate and vanilla) mix. All are amazing.

THAI Kitchen Rice Noodles

  

Think going GF means no more pasta? Think again my friend. Rice noodles is your salvation. When I first started buying GF noodles I started debating whether I was going to drop noodles and pasta off my food chain, they were pricey!! A tip for you......DO NOT purchase pastas from wheat based branded companies (ex. Barilla, Kraft, ConAgra, etc). Once they have it stamped GF the prices skyrocket. Save yourself some $$$$$$ and check out the asian section in your grocer. Most of their pastas are made from rice. Rice = GF. I picked up a box of THAI Kitchen rice noodles for a little over $2 (Meijer)! They are delicious and it makes my wallet (and husband) happy.

Gillian's GF Croutons

I LOVE croutons on my salad, so you can imagine I had another 'christmas moment' when I found these (once again at Meijer). They taste great and aren't badly priced. GF Croutons are something you CAN make on your own if you want to put the time into it.

These are just a few of my favorite GF products. Im sure there are some I'm missing, but will be happy to blog about again when I remember the rest. Living GF doesn't have to feel like the end of the world (once again, first world probs), you can make it 'easier' with the right tools and information. I'm constantly learning and researching and will be happy to help in anyway that I can!! Hope you found this blog helpful!

DARCI

"The Robe"

Sunday mornings while I get ready for 9 o'clock church I really enjoy listening to worship music on Pandora. My favorite station is LDS Hymns of Worship. They play a good variety of gospel hymns along other Sunday favorites. I think it helps set my mind on keeping the Sabbath Day holy and remembering my Savior through out the week.

As I was finishing up my makeup a song came on that really caught my attention. From the beginning I was intrigued. The music, instruments, lyrics, and beautiful angelic voice(s), made me stop what I was doing and listen. Really listen. I found myself in tears when the song was over. I usually don't cry when I listen to music, so I knew I was truly touched! The song is call 'The Robe' by Mercy River. The focus of the song is about a woman who is ill. She prays that she may be healed and made whole, but in turn tells God that if that's not what His plan is that she is fine with that too, but asks that God will wrap her in His Robe and hold her as she goes. Its a tastefully written song about such a tender moment in the lives of all Heavenly Fathers children.

The death of a loved one can be so incredibly harrowing. Heartbreaking. Grievous.

I determine I was so 'aw-struck' by this song because of its ability to make one look at death in a different light. It helped remind me that God has a plan, for me, for everyone. And yes, that plan will one day include leaving this mortal world and the people we love and returning to live with our Savior. I believe Gods plan with us doesn't stop after we leave this world.......He has far greater plans for us. He needs us to continue to do His work in the worlds above. For those who pass away, our Savior needs them. He has called them home to Heaven to continue a mission above. God understands the sorrows we go through when we don't have that physical being in our presence anymore. That is why He created the plan for all of us to come home and be together as eternal families. Life does not have to end here on earth. Wouldn't that make God merciless to not allow relationships to continue to grow and blossom after this life? For fathers and daughters, mothers and sons, grandparents and grandchildren, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc, to say a final goodbye after this life and not continue in the next life would be preposterous. God is anything but merciless.

"The Robe"

Mercy River 

Faithful woman

Reached through the crowd

And her hands, gently touched your robe

And you threw your grace and made her whole

Now my broken body

Is fading fast

And like her, Im searching through the crowds

Desperate to find you somehow

And Im reaching for that robe

I know you can make me whole

But if its not meant to be that way

If I can't stay

Then just wrap me in that robe and hold me when I go

If you call me

Home to you

Please help though's who love me understand

We are still held together by your hands

Im reaching for that robe

I know that you can make me whole

But maybe in a different way

If I can't stay

Then just wrap me in that robe and hold me when I go

Hold her when she goes (women)

Hold her when she goes (little child)

Click here to listen to "The Robe" on Grooveshark.

The 'Jerry Springer' Mom

The day is neigh.

*KINDERGARTEN* 

Most parents look forward to this day like a three year old on Christmas Eve. Not me. I have been dreading this day for the last five years. It has slowly crept up on me like the worst wedgie in the world. And yes, its been a pain in my butt. Literally. 

I've been talking to a lot of friends who have already gone through the 'detaching-myself-from-my-CHILDS-hip' first day of Kindergarten process. A few said they couldn't get their child in the doors fast enough. Some claimed they bawled and even went into a slight depression for a few weeks. Others said they were happy and sad (sounds bipolar to me.......not judging here). So here we have whats called: Individual Processing. Every parent goes through first day detachment (as we will call it) differently. Kind of like every mom goes through labor differently - one experience in never the same. 

But one thing was always the same, all of my friends claimed that no matter my experience with 'first day detachment' it would all be okay. Well, maybe okay except for the minor depressed moms, BUT their's medication for that.

Miss A's school does a Coffee & Kleenex get-together after parents drop off their children on the first day. I will, without a doubt, use all the Kleenex in the room. I'll be bawling like a baby. Snot rolling out my nose. Mascara running down my face making my contacts dry and my eyes blood shot. Popping a few Xanax's in between sniffles and nose blowing. I'll look like your typical Jerry Springer/Maury superstar. But, I'm okay with that. I'm not embarrassed or ashamed that I WILL be a MESS that day. Why wouldn't I be?? My partner in crime will be away for most of the day! Surrounded by people I don't know and she doesn't know. Being influence by those outside of her home (good and bad). Having to completely defend herself. 

I know, I know. You're probably sitting their thinking, "Wow. This lady is crazy. She needs to cut that umbilical cord, NOW."

Let me explain something......

Me and my hot-mess self have reasons behind my overreacting for FDD-day......

First: As for now, and as far as I know, Miss A is my one and only child. So I'm dealing with the eldest, middle, and youngest child all at ONCE. I don't get to say 'Oh I get to go through this again', 'Maybe I can do it this way next time', 'I'm so glad this isn't my only one!', etc, etc, etc. This is it peeps! My one and only shot (of course, as far as I know) at this and Im going to let myself get wasted.......on emotions. Im going to let the crazy come out. Their will be hysterical crying. Depression. Anxiety. Mt Dew. Many phone calls to my mom & sister. Many days I stay in my pjs until 2 pm. More Mt Dew. And then I'll get myself together all by 3:30 in the afternoon to go and pick my sweetheart up. And I'll do it over and over again until I can function like a normal human being outside of my house. 

Second: Its no lie. We live in a scary world. Kids and adults bringing guns and weapons to schools. Bullying. I'm sending my child out to the wolves and hoping my job as a parent will help her survive, seriously. I am aware I can NOT control the uncontrolled. Life will go on as its suppose to and how God has it planned. Doesn't mean it isn't scary. 

Third: Education is so important to me. Will Miss A be receiving the education she needs to learn in order to thrive in her life/career? Will she have teachers/leaders that bring good influential thoughts, behavior, logical thinking, into her life? Will she know the importance of learning and how it can benefit not only herself, but others? Can I play a big enough roll in her life to be that constant aid with education? 

Day by day. Month by Month. Grade by grade. Elementary. Middle School. High School.....and on. Miss A is an amazing little girl and will do wonders in this world through education, our Father in Heaven, faith, inspiration, motivation and family. I'm excited for her to take this next adventure and steps in her life. She will be amazing. Me and my disastrous emotions, now that will take time, but I'll be alright.

Now.......back to sorting out school clothes....... 

Uplifting Talks About Coping with Infertility

I apologize for my big delay in posting my readers stories. I promise I have not forgotten about you and will get your stories posted!

As I lay in my bed this Friday night, and studying for my church lesson, I feel impressed to write this blog post. My lesson for Sunday is about sacred family relationships. Part of the lesson brings up the topic of women who are (for different reasons)  unable to marry and/or bear children. I was impressed (but not surprised) by the kind and gentle words spoken to the women specifically by our leadership. After finishing my lesson I decided I want to look more into this topic of infertility and what our leadership has said about it. Needless to say the information and articles I found only heightened my faith in my Savior.

Before I became to believe what I do today, that the Savior is in control & I must fully trust in Him, life seemed bitter and very hard to not fake happiness. When friends or family (or even at times acquaintances or strangers) would say these few simple words 'just trust in the Lord', I felt myself cringe. I didn't want to hear it. I smiled, nodded in agreement, and left feeling more lost than before. I thought I did trust the Lord. I thought He knew I believed He knew what was best for me and my family. I thought I had faith in believing this. That was it. I thought. I didn't act upon my beliefs. These thoughts were always in the back of my mind, but never once had I truly made them apart of my undying and unconditional faith and love of my understandings. I was stubborn, and was fearful. What if I had put all my trust in the Lord and I didn't receive the answer I had wanted? I wasn't ready to find out if our outlook on life was completely different.

After much conversation with my Savior about what I can do to have a humbled heart and be able to bring these walls down that I had built up so high, I felt impressed to read my Patriarticle Blessing (to see what a Patriarticle Blessing is, click here). It had been a few years since I had picked it up, but I had never forgotten the section where it talks about motherhood. Im about to share something very personal and special to me. In my blessing it states that I will be 'granted one of the most sacred blessings Heavenly Father has for His daughters', that of motherhood. That I will 'stand as a matriarch over a special and wonderful posterity'.
Here's where it always humbles me, 'You will bring sweet spirits into your home'...'they will be precious spirits'.  'They', 'spirits'....it was plural.

I had received my Patriarticle Blessing when I was 14 years of age (if we're doing the math here that was 13 years ago). My Father in Heaven knew I would always need to read and re-read those words. To have reassurance. Faith. Wisdom. Belief. This doesn't mean that day to day life isn't difficult. It doesn't mean my heart never aches for another child or that I don't have bad days where my heart feels heavy and my soul is burdened. But it does remind me that if I continue to live a faithful life and always believe and have faith in my Savior, He will bless me. In His time.

I found a few articles on my churches website (www.lds.org) specifically about infertility. Like I said above, I found myself feeling even more grateful and more faithful than before. The articles were very up lifting. I even found myself taking needed deep breaths. If you have a few minutes please read the articles below. Yes, they are mostly based for people struggling with infertility, but their basis meaning in whole is how to deal with trials and how to stay faithful. Enjoy!

Carolynn R. Spencer: Learning to Cope with Infertility (June 2012 Ensign) - I LOVE this one. She gives many references to women in the scriptures who struggled with infertility. Most stories I had never heard (or remembered) about.

Melissa Merrill: Faith and Infertility (April 2011 Ensign) - Melissa relays stories of four different couples who had/have been struggling with infertility. They're all wonderful stories. There is also a link at the beginning of the article that leads to 15 other couples stories with infertility. 

Sarah Jenkins: Trust, Patience, and Endurance: My Lessons from Infertility - I feel very attached to her article. I, too, have felt many of the same feelings and thoughts that she has. 

And just for fun.......a picture of my lovely darling on Easter.

Stories From Friends

I am so happy to say that I had some responses back from my last post request! Im a little slow with posting them - Im sorry! I was under the weather for 10 days, as well as Miss A and the hubby. So you can imagine......NOTHING got done. We are headed down to one of my favorite cities for the weekend, but when we get back I will post the first email. Im so excited - these are wonderful stories!!

If you want to write an email to me, you still can! I would LOVE to hear from you. If you're not sure what the heck Im even talking about.......read my last post Ü

See you next week!! Have a great weekend!

-DARCI

Pathways of Life & Eternal Growth

Life has funny, humbling and rude awakening ways of letting you know if you're traveling down the path that has been laid out for you. I truly believe we all have a specific path that has been laid out for us and its up to us if we choose to follow it or not. So you may ask, how do we know if we're following the right one? I don't know. Honestly. Sometimes I feel that you will feel it. In your heart. Your soul. Others may like to differ with me but I believe in total dream deja vu. I have frequently had dreams where later on in my life I recall that dream because it is happening in real life. Some may call it coincidence or even that my mind has made it up for me to believe I've 'been here before'. I don't believe that. Not for one bit. I believe its Gods simple, quiet, and reassured way of letting us know you're on the right path. Call me crazy, but that's my thought. I also believe that its through fervent prayer and having a close relationship with God that will allow you to know that you are indeed skipping down the right path.

Kind of a random way to start a post, yeah kind of. I get thoughts in my head how I need to begin and/or write in my blog and I go with it. I've learned not to fight my mind.

Many have asked why it has been so long since I have posted anything on my blog. For reasons I can not comment right now I am unable to specifically answer that question. But I can let you know that my husband, I, and Miss A have recently been through something that truly shook our inner core. Something that I never would have that would happen, did. From the beginning to the end, this situation was both miracle witnessing and completely heartbreaking at the same time. Its been torture watching my sweet Miss A go through so much pain and anguish. Seeing my husband cry. I think there was a time or two I went three plus days without showering. Sometimes Im still confused if Im grieving or depressed. I think it's a little of both.

But through all of the hurt comes a light. I can't tell you how blessed my little family is. We've had an outpouring of love from many people. My parents were able to fly out to Illinois right away and spend 10 days with us. Which was more than a blessing then they will ever know. No thank you's will ever be enough. Im so grateful for them. We had many other blessings here and there that I KNOW were gifts from my Father in Heaven. Through trials and tears come blessings and beauty. I've grown to understand this a little more. Sometimes these blessings are not see or noticed right away, and they may never be, but they are there, if YOU allow YOURSELF to see them.

Do you let yourself see the blessings?

I know that my Savior and my Heavenly Father are men of pure love. I don't even think we can even begin to understand how much love they have for us. We may have an idea, but its not completely understood or accounted for. I believe Gods pure love allows you to grow through trials, heartbreak, confusion, sadness, and everything else that hurts our inner self. I don't know if I ever would have felt so much love from my Savior had we not been through what we have recently. I don't know if I ever would have understood that when it feels like the world around you is crumbling in your hands that our Savior allows us to mold our selfs back together through his loving touch. He loves me. I know he does. He love you, too. Are we allowing ourselves to feel our Saviors love?

Think about it.

When the times comes, if it does, I would love to tell you our story. In the mean time I would love to hear yours. If you would like to share. What trials have you been through? What blessings did you witness from heartbreak? How have you felt your Saviors pure love through trials and tribulations? If you would share, I would love to hear. And I know that my readers would love to hear as well. No story is not good enough. There is ALWAYS someone out there who is going through something similar to what your are or have gone through. People feel comfort in knowing that they are not alone. After sharing my story with infertility I have many people contact me and thank me for sharing. They too have been going through the same or similar situation and felt peace in their hearts that they had someone who could relate and someone to talk to. Isn't this why we go through heartbreak and trials? If and when we do we are able to assist and help those who are in need of comfort. We are here to serve one another.

Are we serving?

If you would like to share your story please email me at darcivbentley@live.com
If you would like your story published on my blog and wish to remain anonymous please let me know. Otherwise I would like to list your first name, first letter of last name, and state of which you live.
I would like to prematurely thank you for having the courage to share your story. It isn't easy. But you may never know who's life you have changed because you decided to share. I plan on posting a story from a reader once a week if I have enough stories. If not, I will post them as soon as they come.

Have a wonderful day readers Ü    

For the LOVE of......pancakes?

LOVE

I meant to post this yesterday, but I was enjoying my day of love with my two sweethearts. As the day was going on I couldn't help but ponder 'What is love?'. Well, I decided to see what the world describes love as.....just for fun.

The dictionary describes it as:

"strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child>
affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> an assurance of affection <give her my love> warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea> the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration<baseball was his first love> a person's adoration of God." 

It went on for a little while and there were plenty more 'adult-ish' definitions, but I won't get into those.....hello, young folks read this too! Then it gave some examples of love:

1. Children need unconditional love from their parents.
2. He was just a lonely man looking for love.     <--------insert small chuckle
3. Mr. Brown seems to imply that when he retired he relinquished her love as casually as he dispensed with her secretarial services. —Ken Follett, New York Times Book Review, 27 Dec. 1987

I then traveled over to the thesaurus. Other words that were used to describe love:

adulation, affection, amity, amour, appreciation, ardor, attachement, crush, delight, devotedness, emotion, enchantment, enjoyment, fervor, fidelity, flame, fondness, friendship, inclination, infatuation, involvement, like, rapture, respect, sentiment, weakness, worship, yearning, zeal

Next, out of pure curiosity, I asked Google, "What is love". Note to self, don't ask Google what love is....... I decided to check some social networks that I belong to. I was curious to see how people were reacting to Valentines Day. Of course there is the typical excitement of the day; flowers being delivered, chocolates, candies, and other things that will not be mentioned. Pictures being posted left and right of folks Valentines treasures (not gonna lie......at the end of the day I was tired of seeing flowers). Then there were the 'Scrooges of V-Day'. I love reading the 'anti- V-Day' statuses. Of course, it got me thinking. Why do people hate Valentines Day? Its the day of celebrating love, right? Most of the scrooge statues came from those who unfortunately (but maybe not unfortunate?) didn't have a 'special someone' to celebrate it with......okay, no surprise there (but let me make clear that not ALL non-couple folks fall into this hatred of the day of love). But then there were the others who HAD a loved one (spouse, significant other, etc) to celebrate the day of looooooove with. So why were they despising it? I decided on a few reasons: 1. Their S/O wasn't there to celebrate the day with (working, drunk, playing X-Box, etc) 2. Their S/O always forgets Valentines Day or thinks it a waste of February space, so therefore no flowers and chocolates and whatnot 3. They spend too much time drooling over what others had received for Valentines Day and became hostile to their S/O for sucking at gift ideas and demanding them to return the loofa and bath salts 4. Something happened when they were younger on Valentines Day and they haven't been able to get it over it since ( i.e. Jenny was in love with Roger and thought Roger loved Jenny, but Roger gave Cindy a Valentine Card in the 3rd grade that stated, 'You ROCK Valentine!' with some conversation hearts that said 'Be Mine' 'Call Me' 'I luv u'. Tragic.) 5. They are just straight up TOO COOL for such a holiday 6. Lastly, they don't believe that you should only show someone you love them ONE day out of 365 days. Because, who does that? I'm not sure if I know anyone who only loves one day out of the year........scratch that......my cat, but her day of love is usually Christmas when she runs up and down my tree, knocking down ornaments, and pulling down stockings. So, how do you change the mind of a Valentine scrooge...... You introduce them to pink-heart shaped GLUTEN-FREE pancakes. Problem solved. The Worlds Easiest & Yummiest *GLUTEN-FREE* Pancakes I think the saying is "You crave what you can't have"......okay, maybe I just made that up, but I can tell you that I have been craving waffles and pancakes ever since I was diagnosed with CD. I searched high and low in many, many stores for a gluten-free pancake mix. Including those fancy swanky 'earthy-organic' stores and to my luck I either couldn't find a gluten-free pancake mix or it was WAY to expensive. I began searching on the internet to try to find a recipe that I could put together. By the fourth or fifth recipe I found myself starting to hit the keyboard keys harder with my fingers. It was so frustrating! I couldn't find a recipe that included ingredients that I already had in my house. There are so many different flours that go into a gluten-free meal (many of those I don't have yet....again, expensive!) and many, many other ingredients that I didn't have and didn't feel like going on the search for around town. As I begin searching through my kitchen for another Valentines dinner idea I spotted this my Betty Crocker's Gluten-Free Yellow Cake Mix. The light bulb in my head went crazy and I was desperate. Could I make pancakes out of cake mix? HECK YES I CAN! Its pretty simple to make. Just follow the cooking and recipe instructions on the back of the box.  ** I did switched around a few things. Instead of adding water (like the recipe calls for) I used milk instead. I also added about 1-2 teaspoons of corn starch (just to make sure they'd be fluffy) & red food dye, of course! You mix all of the ingredients together and cook them like you would any normal pancake and BAM! you have yourself some delicious gluten-free pancakes.

  

Mmmmmm....

If you have picky pancake eaters like I do, try making 'mini pancakes' or what we call them in my house 'finger foods'. Miss A will not eat pancakes, but she ate the mini ones that she could dip in her syrup. Success!

'Hmmm, not sure about this'....

'Okay, here it goes"....

'Thumbs up MOM!'

YUM! Don't they look delicious!?

And just in case you're sick of looking at pictures of flowers......

You can look at mine Ü

Now go enjoy your easy peasy gluten-free pancakes! Write me and let me know if you tried out the recipe! Have a good weekend!

What is CD or Gluten Intolerance

Growing up I never ran into problems with certain foods. I could eat anything I wanted. Around 4 or 5 months after Miss A was born I started noticing changes in my bowel movements (ewww) and was having really intense stomach pains. One night specifically I remember taking a trip to the ER. I thought I was dying. Seriously, dying. I thought my stomach, at any moment, was going to explode all over the waiting room. I have never had stomach pain EVER like that in my life. After a few hours of sitting in the lovely, cold ER waiting room, I was called back. The diagnosis.......gas. Trust me, Ive had gas before, and I could have promised that ER doctor that it was not gas. She referred me to a gastroenterologist doctor to do some further testing into my "gas" problem. 

After seeing the "Gas Doctor" and jotting down some family history (we have a lot of bowel issues in my family tree) she decided it was best to do a Colonoscopy. Can I just tell you how AWWWFUL the prep was for the colonoscopy?! At the time we were on state insurance because Josh was in school full time and I was staying at home with Miss A (so we pretty much ate dirt for dinner). So due to having state insurance I was given the worst possible colonoscopy prep drink. They gave it to me in a GALLON jug. It looked like water. I thought, "huh, this shouldn't be too bad". Oh, was I EVER so wrong. It tasted like I was drinking liquid metal, mixed with gasoline and urine. I was suppose to drink the entire gallon in less than 8-10 hours. For most of the day I sat in the bathroom, hugging the toilet and a bowl (for throwing up in). That day was worse than labor pains. 

The next morning was the colonoscopy. Im back in the pre-op room when the nurse asks me, "Hun, did you finish ALL of your liquid drink?" I kindly replied, "Ma'am, have you ever had to drink it yourself? No, no I did NOT finish ALL of that nasty drink, and if they still find poop in my digestive tract, I don't give a crap - no pun intended". She nodded, left the room, and came back with my IV. 

The procedure itself was not bad at all. I was knocked out (all though I do remember seeing images of my bowel here and there on the TV screen, but don't recall any pain or anything else) and 30 minutes later I was in the recovery room. I don't remember much there. Josh states that I kept repeating over and over and over again, "MY BUTT IS WET! MY BUTT IS WET!! MY BUTT IS WET!!!" Someone finally came in and gave me a towel. Lovely, huh?

A few days later I met up again with the gastroenterologist. The diagnosis........Lactose Intolerant. Oooooookay. So from now on I couldn't eat anything with lactose in it. So yes, cheese, milk, ice cream, yogurt, cheesecake, etc. You get the picture. HELLO!!! I live off dairy! It was quite the change. After going off lactose almost completely (come on, you think I could live without ice-cream?!) I started feeling better, but not ever completely. I still had constant stomach pains and irregular bowel changes for a few years after. My sweet hubby couldn't even put his arm around my stomach at night because it was so uncomfortable and painful for me. Miss A couldn't lay on her mommas stomach either. 

Now in modern day.....

I was seeing my family doctor for a yearly checkup. He just did the regular stuff, you know the blood pressure, pulse, listening to heart and lungs.....that kind of stuff. He then had me lie down and began pressing on my stomach. For a split second I thought about ripping his eyes out. AAhhhHHhHH......GOSH, it hurt! I explained that I was lactose intolerant and that my stomach was in pain all the time and if he was smart he'd better stop pressing on my stomach or he'd push out a fart (yes, I said fart). He said he wanted to see me in two months and we'd discuss some things.

Fast forward to mid-January (this year).....

Im at my doctor appointment. Once again he does a check up and once again presses on my guts. Yes, yes doctor they still hurt. He began asking me about my diet. "Do you eat a lot of breads and pastas?"........."Ummm, YES! I live off that stuff." - I replied. He then explained to me that it sounded as though I had a gluten intolerance and needed to go on a gluten free diet right away. He was concerned that I had been feeling this way for over four years. He ordered some blood tests to check for the antibody. He explained that a high percentage of people who are diagnosed with CD don't have the antibody appear in their blood. My test came back negative. He called to tell me to continue my gluten free diet and that THAT would be the true test. I've now been gluten free for about 4 weeks. I've never felt better. My bowels feel healthy. The majority of my pain has subsided. 

I later learned that lactose intolerance is secondary to CD. Its believed that I was misdiagnosed four years ago. Since a colonoscopy is only done in your lower intestines and checking for CD is done in your smaller intestines, it was missed. It also common to have a sibling or siblings with Colitis (click here to learn about Colitis). My sister has colitis. There were many signs out there that would have led to a sooner diagnosis IF we would have known what to look for and that CD was a possibility. 

It has been quite an adventure learning what I can and cannot eat. It has led to a MUCH healthier diet. Lots of fruits and veggies. Potatoes. Corn. Rice. Josh has been very supportive. He and Miss A have even joined me in eating a gluten free diet........well, they mostly have. Miss A can not live without her Kraft 'Homestyle Mac and Cheese'. I had a lot of help from others as well. So my change wasn't as difficult as it may have been. 

Down below I have put together some information about CD and gluten intolerance. It is becoming more and more common because doctors are looking at the signs and testing. If you feel that you or someone you know may have it, please read further. If needed, don't be afraid to make an appointment with your doctor. (Some words will have a '*' next to it, this is indicating the sign and symptoms I personally had).  

Celiac Disease or Gluten Intolerance

"Celiac Disease is a digestive condition triggered by consumption of the protein gluten, which is primarily found in bread, pasta, cookies, pizza crust and many other foods containing wheat, barley or rye. People with celiac disease who eat foods containing gluten experience an immune reaction in their small intestines, causing damage to the inner surface of the small intestine and an inability to absorb certain nutrients.

Celiac disease can cause abdominal pain and diarrhea. Eventually, the decreased absorption of nutrients (malabsorption) that occurs with celiac disease can cause vitamin deficiencies that deprive your brain, peripheral nervous system, bones, liver and other organs of vital nourishment.

No treatment can cure celiac disease. However, you can effectively manage celiac disease by changing your diet."

What are the symptoms?

There are no typical signs and symptoms of celiac disease. Most people with the disease have general complaints, such as:

• Intermittent diarrhea
• Abdominal pain *
• Bloating *

Sometimes people with celiac disease may have no gastrointestinal symptoms at all. Celiac disease symptoms can also mimic those of other conditions, such as irritable bowel syndrome, gastric ulcers, Crohn's disease, parasite infections and anemia.

Celiac disease may also present itself in less obvious ways, including:

• Irritability or depression *
• Anemia
• Stomach upset *
• Joint pain
• Muscle cramps *
• Skin rash
• Mouth sores
• Dental and bone disorders (such as osteoporosis)
• Tingling in the legs and feet (neuropathy)* - I had tingling and numbness in my hands and fingertips

Some indications of malabsorption of nutrients that may result from celiac disease include:

• Weight loss
• Diarrhea
• Abdominal cramps, gas and bloating *
• General weakness and fatigue *
• Foul-smelling or grayish stools that may be fatty or oily
• Stunted growth (in children)
• Osteoporosis

What is the cause?

The cause of CD is still unknown to doctors. They do know that CD or gluten intolerance usually run in families. "Researchers have discovered that some gene mutations seem to increase the risk of celiac disease, but having those gene mutations doesn't mean you're certain to have celiac disease. This means that other risk factors play a role in whether you'll develop celiac disease."

What are the complications of CD?

• Malnutrition. 
• Loss of calcium and bone density. 
• Lactose intolerance. 
• Cancer. (usually bowel related)
• Neurological complications. 

Tests and Diagnosis:

"Tests and procedures used to diagnose celiac disease include:

• Blood tests. Blood tests can detect higher than normal levels of certain antibodies (anti-endomysium and anti-tissue transglutaminase) in people with celiac disease. Antibodies are specialized proteins that are part of your immune system and work to eliminate foreign substances in your body. In people with celiac disease, their immune systems may be recognizing gluten as a foreign substance and producing elevated levels of antibodies to get rid of it.
• Collecting a sample of small intestine for testing. To confirm the diagnosis, your doctor may want to examine a small portion of intestinal tissue to check for damage to the villi. To do this, your doctor inserts a thin, flexible tube (endoscope) through your mouth, esophagus and stomach into your small intestine and takes a sample of intestinal tissue to examine under a microscope.
• Swallowing a camera pill that collects pictures of the small intestine. In some cases your doctor may want to examine the entire small intestine with a capsule endoscopy. This procedure involves swallowing a pill-sized capsule that contains a tiny camera. As the camera travels through your digestive tract, it takes thousands of images and sends them to a recorder you wear on a belt. Your doctor reviews the pictures to see the inside of your small intestine. The capsule leaves your body in your stool and can be flushed down the toilet.

Some people try a gluten-free diet on their own, to see if that helps relieve their signs and symptoms. But doing so may change the results of blood tests so that they appear to be normal. So see your doctor for testing first, before you try a gluten-free diet."

Treatments and Drugs:

"Celiac disease has no cure, but you can effectively manage the disease through changing your diet.

Changes to your diet to avoid gluten
To manage the disease and prevent complications, it's crucial that you avoid all foods that contain gluten, including:

• Barley
• Bulgur
• Durum
• Farina
• Graham flour
• Rye
• Semolina
• Spelt (a form of wheat)
• Triticale
• Wheat

Vitamin supplements to combat malnutrition If your nutritional deficiencies are severe, you may need to take vitamin and mineral supplements recommended by your doctor or dietitian to help correct these deficiencies. Your doctor may recommend supplements to increase your levels of:"

• Calcium
• Folate
• Iron
• Vitamin B-12
• Vitamin D
• Vitamin K

(Click HERE for foods to avoid and allowed food ideas)

(All quoted sentences and paragraphs are information provided by MayoClinic.com)

My plan is to post gluten free recipes and/or gluten free food ideas frequently. Even if you don't need to eat gluten free you can still try these recipes! Have a good weekend!

Our Story

The Tale of Two Love Birds

Once
           upon
                      a
                           time.....


Eh, sorry, this is not a fairy tale. This is life. You're about to embark on an adventure with me. I like to think that Im an honest person. Honest with my doings, my speech, my thoughts. So my stories I write will be that, honest. Its all starts with a tall, handsome man and a stray woman.....


Almost seven years ago exactly, there I was, a distracted, wayward, single gal trying my best to figure out life. I was lost momentarily and wasn't sure if I'd ever figure out who I was or what God had in store for me. A close friend of mine had tried notably hard to convinced me to start attending my church again, regularly. I was hesitant and stubborn. I hadn't prayed or even stepped into a church for over two years. I wasn't proud of my life and wondered if God had felt the same about me. One morning, quickly after I awoke, I had a strange and very clear thought and feeling.......

it was time

Time to get my life straight. Time to let go of my selfish ways. Time to have God in my life again. 

But would God have me back?         

I set up a meeting with my Bishop. I cried almost the entire hour and a half meeting. My mascara was gone. My contacts were suction cupped to my eyes and they were almost swollen completely shut. Snot  was dripping down my face like a broken faucet. I was A MESS. My Bishop placed his arms around me and told me that my Father in Heaven loved me, He was proud of me, and He's been awaiting my return. That was it, that was all I needed to hear. After that I was willing to put forth the effort needed in order for me to have good standing in my church again. No one judged me, they loved me. 

Now, fast forward two weeks......

Every Sunday in my singles ward (church gathering) our Bishop would hold a Sunday Prayer in the evening. Anyone was welcomed to come. This was usually the time when new people would introduce themselves (AKA = stalking the single people). My girlfriends and I decided to go. We had heard that a new guy was there (<------insert 'tall, handsome man'). He was attending BYU and UVU getting his Bachelors degree in Neuroscience in hopes to be accepted into medical school, and BONUS......he drove a truck. I remember one of my girlfriends announcing, "He's mine! Whoever he is, I call dibs!" I couldn't help but giggle and hoped that he looked like Mutt (Shania Twains old flame), so I could laugh at my friend and encourage a fast engagement. 

We arrive at church and walk into the room. As soon as I walked in my eyes met his and I instantly got butterflies. I knew he was the 'new guy' and I knew there was NO WAY my friend was calling dibs on him. Even if I had to knock her out and send her to the hospital, there was no way she was getting to him first. He stood up and introduced himself, "Hi, Im Josh Bentley.....". Bentley, that has a nice ring to it. He continued on and sat down and our prayer meeting began. It couldn't of ended fast enough. As soon as we closed in prayer and helped pick up the chairs, my girlfriend was out the door and off to meet Mr. Bentley. To try not to seem like a scavenger I slowly made my way over. Fighting off the urge to shove my friend out the door. I smiled, he smiled. He seemed shy. We all didn't talk long. He had to go home to study. As we were driving back home to our small two bedroom apartment my girlfriend wouldn't stop talking about Mr. B and how she thought he was so cute and was going to be rich, Rich, RICH one day. I let her continue talking. I knew I'd marry that man, one day. 

Fast forward two weeks......

Long story short, he FINALLY asked me out on a date. I say finally like it was a century, IT WAS, or at least it felt that way. His friend convinced him to ask me out. Gosh, I know, 'convinced'. Lets poor the salt in the wound people. Come to find out he was/is terribly shy and didn't know if he had the courage to ask me out. Awwwwww! Anyways, we had a wonderful first date. We went on a triple date with his two roommates and their dates. They took us miniature golfing (which I kicked butt at) and then back to their apartment for a homemade meal that THEY had prepared (already a keeper in my book). After dinner we all decided to watch a movie. We all sat on the floor or the couch and began watching. I made it probably 20 minutes into the movie and I passed out, cold. When the movie was over, the lights flicked on and there I was, sleeping. On Josh's shoulder, drooling. So much for a first impression! Josh drove me home. I thanked him for the date and walked inside wondering if he'd ever WANT to ask me out again. Much to my surprise he called me the next day. The drool must not have stained his shirt. We continued dating and quickly fell in love.

Three months after dating, Josh popped the question Mothers Day weekend. It was perfect, beautiful. He took me down to Southern Utah to spend some time with his parents. Well, that's what the trip was suppose to be for. On Saturday morning he took me golfing with his dad (smart guy, bringing his dad along so I wouldn't be suspicious). I remember Josh totally stinking at golf that day. He is normally a VERY good golfer. Maybe he was having an off day, I thought. We then drove over to Zion's National Park where we were going to meet his grandparents for dinner at a lovely restaurant right in the heart of the Park. It was beautiful. If you haven't seen Zion's National Park, it needs to go on the bucket list. Its a nice reminder how wonderful and powerful God is. We arrived at the restaurant. His parents let us know that his grandparents haven't quite arrived yet and that we should go 'enjoy the scenery'. Okay, if you say so. Josh took my hand and led me over a bridge. I remember the water lightly flowing over the smooth rocks. The trees, ground, and shrubbery were all green and magnificent. Flowers were bloomed and lovely. We walked a little more when I noticed there was a cute little wooden gazebo all dazzled and decorated up, but no one was occupying it. I commented to Josh, "Well thats really weird and stupid and they have it all set up and no one is using it." Josh just smiled and we started walking back over to the bridge. He stopped in the middle of the bridge and was looking over the edge at the water. He turned and hugged me. I could hear and feel his heart beating....no, no, RACING. I thought either this man is about to have a heart attack or something is about to happen. Turns out, it was both. He dropped on one knee and asked me to be his wife. I didn't say anything. No words would come out. I wanted to jump up and down and scream YES! but I was paralyzed (<-----insert Josh's heart attack). Finally after about 5-10 looooooooong seconds and me mumbling 'Ummmmm......UMMMMMM....UUmmmmMMmmm',........... I said yes Ü The ring was perfect. I was shaking so bad Im surprised he was able to put it on. It fit like a glove. After lots of hugging and smooching (duh) Josh took my hand and we started walking back toward were the gazebo was. It took me a second to realize it was for US! This stupid, adorably set up random, out in the middle of nowhere gazebo, wasn't so stupid anymore. It was immaculate. We had dinner, all by ourselves, in the middle of Zion's Canyon. Dinner was amazing, but I could hardly eat any of it. I was too excited!! We finished the day off by seeing a play/musical with his parents and grandparents. When we arrived back at Josh's parents home there was a gorgeous vase filled with two dozen red roses.

We were married three months later on the 25th of August in the Salt Lake City Mormon Temple. That day was paradisiacal. I couldn't believe I was marrying the man that I loved so much. I remember being in the sealing room with most of our family and friends and only seeing him. Everything else was a blur. We spent the day with our family and friends and each other. I was so happy. He was so happy. We were beginning to begin our journey as a couple.

Fast forward five months.......

If you haven't quite figured it out, when your a Mormon on 'Mormon Time' (like I like to call it), everything happens quickly. Especially marriage and babies. The marriage had already quickly happened, now the babies. In March of 07' I peed on one of those lovely pregnancy pee sticks. It was positive. I couldn't believe it. I was going to be a mother! I was over whelmed with excitement, tears, and fears. I ran out of the bathroom and showed Josh. We hugged. We were both excited, nervous, young, and naive. I was 21 and Josh was almost 23. A few weeks go by. Im at work (I was a teller at a local Credit Union) when suddenly I feel cramping. Not knowing too much about being pregnant I passed it off as gas or upset stomach. No more than 10 minutes later it feels like Ive slightly peed myself. "Im an adult!", I think to myself, "why did I just pee in my pants!". I excuse myself to go to the restroom. When I pull my slacks down I saw something that I was never expecting. I instantly stopped breathing. Is this really happening? Tears started pouring out of my eyes faster than they can make them. Why God why?! Why are you doing this to me?! I was having a miscarriage at 7 weeks. I didn't even realize how long I have been laying on the bathroom floor at work until I heard a knock on the door. "Darci, are you okay?". It was one of my co-workers. I opened the door to the single bathroom and told her what was happening. I could hardly speak. My heart was broken. She helped me clean up my face and helped me up off the floor. She put my money drawer away, gave me my keys, and told me to go home. I drove home, crying the whole way. I didn't want to call or text Josh at school so I waited the tortuous 8 hours before he'd be home. We hadn't told anyone in both of our families that we had been trying to have a baby. We wanted to keep it a secret so if it happened it would be a surprise to everyone. Because I was stubborn and dumb I suffered alone. Josh came home from school to find his once pregnant wife crying on the couch. Eyes puffy and red. Tissues everywhere. I told him what happened. We both weren't quite sure how to react. Like I said, we were young. I never healed from the pain I felt. I continued to ask God why. WHY? Why would He allow this to happen to me? To let me go through all this pain. I thought He loved me? He did. I just didn't know it, yet.

Fast forward two months.......

Im pregnant, again. Im shocked. Im pregnant again that fast, that quickly?! I cried. I was happy, but even more nervous and cautious this time around. Was it for real this time? Would we have a healthy baby in 9 months? I told Josh. He smiled and seemed happy. I couldn't quite tell. I remember praying to my Heavenly Father, BEGGING Him to let me keep this baby. I would do ANYTHING for Him. One night, 3 weeks later (I'm now 7 weeks again), Josh and I are sitting on the couch laughing and talking lighting. Suddenly I feel the same wet sensation. Could it be? Could this be happening again? I knew in my heart before I looked down that I was in fact having my second miscarriage. I stopped talking, looked at Josh, and ran to the bathroom. I started crying, hysterically. Josh knew what was going on. He left me alone. Not quite sure what to do or say. Once again I laid there alone, very alone. Feeling that God has abandoned me. Why is he doing this to me? Why is He not allowing me to have the ONE thing I want and that He has asked of me to do. Create beings in His image. Our families still had no clue we had been trying or that I now had gone through two miscarriages. One month later Josh is accepted into A.T. Still University's medical school in Arizona. Three weeks later we pack up our little bit of belongings and head down south.

Fast forward three months......

Im late, again. No, not late to work, or church, my period. I waited and waited to take a test. I was too nervous that I WOULD be pregnant. I didn't want to know. With much encouragement from two of my close friends and co-workers I took a test. Positive. This time there were no smiles, no tears. Just an overwhelming sense of fear and premeditated heartbreak. Thats three pregnancies in less than a year. Why was I being continually tormented? I was just going to lose this baby too, right? I went about my day(s) normal as if I wasn't pregnant (no I didn't drink or smoke.....I'm 'Mormon' remember?). I didn't want to think about it. I didn't want to get attached or make that motherly connection with this heavenly miracle growing inside of me. The dreaded week 7 approaches. I wait and wait. Is it going to happen? Week 7 passes. Okay is God playing around with me? 'If I'm going to miscarry just do it already!' - I yelled to Him. I couldn't believe the anger I still had towards God. I knew He loved me and I loved Him. I would do anything for Him and Him for I. Was I always going to have an overwhelmingly- insensitive bitterness towards Him? I wasn't ready to figure that out yet. Selfish is me. Week 8 arrives. Still pregnant. The weeks continue.....9, 10, 11, 12. Josh and I decide to tell our families about news. Christmas Day of 07' we tell Josh's side. The next day (December, 26th) we let my family know. Everyone is so excited, obscured to them of the agony we've been through. Week 13 arrives. I begin to tell myself that this really could be. I start believing it. Maybe. Week 14 I finally have my first doctors appointment. Due to the fact that this was my very first appointment with him, he does the full monty. He does blood work, a pap smear (oye, I hate those things), then checks out the boobs - they were good (and still perky back then). Next he pulls out this strange looking walky-talky thing with a mini microphone attached to it. "Now we're going to listen to the babies heartbeat". I hold my breath. Close my eyes. Will it be there? Will I hear it?

Thud-dud, thud-dud, thud-dud.... 

I hear you baby. You have a strong heartbeat. Just like your daddy. I begin breathing again. Next an ultrasound. Wait. I get to SEE my baby? He takes me back to another room. Josh takes my hand. He turns on the ultrasound machine and places that wand on my stomach. There she is. She's beautiful. Alive. Healthy. Of course we don't know she's a 'she' yet, but she's perfect. Six weeks later we have an ultrasound done to know the sex. "It's a GIRL!" the tech exclaims. A girl......wow. Not only am I having a baby, but Im have a girl. Weeks go by, of course not without trials and a rough pregnancy. Miss 'A' (as we will call her) kept trying to come out early. The L & D knew us by name. I had to go in three times to have my contractions stopped. Once because Miss A was pinching off my ureter (that hurt like hell) and at 34 weeks I was so blessed to get what is called PUPPP's syndrome (click here to read about it's wretchedness). Finally D-Day came. I was being induced because my fluid was extremely low. I was one day off my due date when Miss A arrived. The labor was wonderful, the delivery - not so much. I pushed and pushed and pushed for five, yes FIVE, hours. She was finally delivered via forceps. Out she came, perfect. Crying, but so sweetly and softly. They placed her on my chest. She instantly stopped crying. Her eyes were wide open, looking at me. It was real, she was here, with me, in my arms. Breathing, heart beating, perfect toes, beautiful eyes, tons of jet black hair. She was mine.

Fast forward four and a half years........

Hello, we're here in modern time and going through the same, but different trial. Josh and I have been trying for baby number two for a little over three years now, but this time without any pregnancies. Sometimes I cant help but feel guilty that Im struggling with this. There are many, many others who don't have any children of their own, or who have been trying for longer than we have. What gives me the right to feel like I have it hard? Over the last three years I have been doing a LOT of soul searching. Trying to make it right with my Heavenly Father again. Letting go of my anger altogether. It took me awhile, but I finally reached the point where I realized its not Gods fault, its not my fault, its nobodies 'fault'. This is the plan that God has for me and my family. Why? We each have our own individual plans that God has laid out for us. He knows each of us on a personal note. He knows are needs and wants. He knows our hearts. He's felt our heartaches and cried our tears. He has felt EVERY-SINGLE-POSSIBLE hurt and pain there ever has and ever will be. Once I realized this, I never felt alone. I knew I had at least one person who knew EXACTLY what I was going through, and He was the most important person in my life. My Father in Heaven. Why did He allow us to go through what we did and what we continue to go through? I don't know.......but I do know its for our wellbeing. Because like the love I have for my daughter, He has that same love for me. I try to raise my daughter the way that will bring her closer to her Father in Heaven. I try to let her experience things on her own, so she can learn and hopefully make right choices. She makes mistakes, but learns from them, and they can only help her grow. This is the same thing God is doing to me, to us. He see's my weaknesses and turns them into strengths. He see's my trails and knows that I will be able to bless the lives of others with my experiences.

So here we are. Living day by day. Trying to be better believers and followers of our Savior. What does God have in store for us......

Im afraid you know as best as we do.

All I know is that God has a plan.....for all of us. As simple, but hard as it is.....we need to trust FULLY in Him. If we try our best to live our lives to the utmost way that God wants us to, He will bless us. All He wants us to be is happy....if we let Him.

If you want, I invite you on our journey. Welcome.              


-Darci